The Calgary Stampede

For any of you who know me, you know how much I live for Stampede. It is my favourite ten days in July, and, I always say, the only reason I'm still in Calgary. While I'm not into rides, or carnivals or rodeos, I do love how the city all bands together to play and take part in something for ten days straight.

This year, I have visitors staying in my house from Kuwait who, I believe, have never been to the Stampede. I decided to put together a little list of "Must-knows/haves" for Stampede. This is what it looks like:

CALGARY STAMPEDE MUST KNOW/HAVE

-          The Calgary Stampede 2011 will run from July 7th to July 17th (10 days and over two weekends). The city really does go crazy. Some locals head out of town to avoid it, and others revel in it. The city also at least doubles in population due to people coming from all over the world to attend.

-          Jeans, cowboy boots, and cowboy hats are standard attire for the full ten days. You will see this everywhere. Even and ESPECIALLY Downtown Calgary.

-          Nightclubs double and triple their cover charges.

-          There are “Stampede Breakfasts” all over town. This includes pancakes (generally two per person) bacon and/or sausage, a juice, and sometimes eggs. These are free, and only require you to show up and line up. I will provide a list of some that I know are in the area. The breakfasts sometimes also have little pony rides, face painting, and live music.

-          The Stampede Grounds are named as such, and are around the Saddledome Downtown Calgary. C-Train or LRT is also a viable way to get down there. You can park at some of the main C-Train stations, and it drops you right at the grounds.

-          Admission is $15 for adults $8 for kids (7-12) and free for 6 and under.

-          Parking can be around $20/car depending on where you go. C-train is $2.75 for adults one way. Children less than that. If you go to any gas station or small convenience store they can give you books of 10 bus/c-train passes at a discount.

-          There are fireworks every night on the grounds between around 10:30 and 11:30pm. This is because there is a Grandstand show put on by the “Young Canadians” which includes dancing, acrobatics, etc. The show starts at 8pm with the Chuckwagon races, and ends with fireworks. Tickets range from around $15 for rush seating (standing room, or far side seats) to several hundred.

-          The Grandstand is also home to the Rodeo portion of the Stampede. Tickets also range for that depending on what you are looking to see. Tickets can usually be bought online at Ticketmaster, or on the grounds themselves.

-          The Stampede is also a carnival, and therefore has a large ride, game and food section. You can buy individual tickets for the rides, or wrist bands for unlimited rides for the day. These can also be purchased on the grounds or in advance generally at a Safeway, or other major store. 

-          There exists a Coca Cola stage by the Victoria Park entrance to the grounds, and various bands play there every night. Refer to your guide for specifics.

-          There is an indoor market for shopping (tradeshow) inside the large BMO centre. This is also attached to an arena for the Ice Show – a Must See for the kids!!

-          Bell Rodeo X is also another great thing for kids. Usually a motor-cross show with acrobatics. Held in the middle of the grounds either in a large tent, or cordoned off area. Refer to the guide for more information.

-          The grounds are essentially a LARGE parking lot. So you will be on asphault all day long. Wear comfortable shoes, have some kind of hat and lots of water/sunscreen.

-          When looking at the Coca Cola stage, veer off to the left, and you’ll find Weedickville. By far the best deal on the grounds. Hot Dogs, slurpies, and sub sandwiches can be bought here for really reasonable prices. Good way to eat on the run!

HAPPY STAMPEDING EVERYONE!!!!

Social Events/Gatherings

In the last five days, I've attended a play, a fundraiser-type event, a funeral service, a bridal shower, and a general social gathering (BBQ), and I felt the need, per se, to comment on them. I think social events/gatherings can say a lot about human nature. After all, we are indeed social creatures. As I've said before, we really do need other people in our lives, much as some may argue, and much as some may hate to admit it. But truly, we do need to be with others. And there are innumerable ways of doing that.

Some ways are more interactive than others. For example, a BBQ holds more opportunity for interaction than, say, going out to a play. Some are more emotionally charged as in the case of a funeral service or perhaps a fundraiser, depending on what the funds are being raised for. Having run the full gamut of emotions this week (crying at funerals, and laughing at bridal showers) I really appreciate the diversity in my life. What's so amazing, is that this is available to all of us, in all our lives.

I invite you to think about your week, either just past, or coming up. Perhaps even extend that out to a month. What social events/gatherings did you attend. And, more importantly, WHY? Because to me, this is one of the most interesting questions to ask with regards to social events. When there are so many choices, so many varied activities, what is it that makes one choose an event over another? As mentioned in my 20 Things I've Learned This Year, Opportunity Cost is very prevalent in most peoples' decision making process. So, how do we rule out what we attend, and what we don't, and which cost is the least, and which benefit is the best? And are we always right?


Some gatherings are no brainers. Funerals are a good example of this. It is one of the only social gatherings in which it is acceptable to hold it at any time during the week, and people are permitted to put everything on pause in order to attend. Perhaps this is why it is a no brainer? There is very little opportunity cost with regards to a funeral, as you cannot lose your job, your friends/spouse/family cannot blame you, and essentially, the world will stand still so that you may attend. And so, with nothing to lose, we are free to attend. In thinking about this further, it is really only fair. As funeral's are so painful, there should be no downfall in attending and paying ones respects. As I attended one this week, the thought did occur to me that it is such a shame that one of the main events that draws all the people you care about into one room for you happens when you are no longer around. Seems like such a waste.

Making the decision to go to fundraisers, or to a play invites a little bit more of the weighing of options, pros, cons etc. As these two often demand the commitment of more than just time (and often monetarily) what is it that drives people to make such commitments? I would like to say some of it is curiosity? A sense of just looking for something out there, something different. I think supporting others in their efforts can come into play (pardon the pun) as it did for me... And the desire (in the case of a fundraiser) to help add to something bigger than oneself? Trying to attain Maslow's Self Actualization by reaching out to do good for others, for the environment, for the economy, or even for the world at large.

And then we come to the last category (of my events anyways) that of the bridal shower, and the BBQ. The BBQ offers a chance to merely catch up, to touch base with others, to enjoy other company. Whether they are with close friends, relatives, or people you only share a few things in common with, the decisions to attend stem from the concept of Opportunity Cost at it's very core. Bridal showers, however, invite a certain paradigm to them. They are almost always happy, they are always sort of an expected rite of passage, a marking-of-time, a pushpin in the roadmap of life. It is to support our fellow human beings, our peers, that we attend these events. And yet, we benefit as well, as we are able to step in to this roadmap and be a part of this rite of passage. We glimpse the road, and we mark time, and it is a sort of opportunity for us to re-evaluate our own roadmap, and (though we'd sometimes rather not) compare it amongst ourselves. This can make such an event hard or great, and can also determine our will to attend, or even how long we stay... In my case, I was just happy to be there, glimpse the road and say "I'm okay, you're okay, it's all okay. Carry on". :)

Social events are an opportunity to have a touch stone. To see others and have them see us. To remember we are all part of the same world, but are allowed, and even encouraged to view it and approach it differently. I am blessed to have so many avenues to explore this with. And I hope you are all more aware of the social events you attend, especially as the summer draws near. Make conscious decisions, and be present at the events. They are such rich opportunities for self and human nature discoveries!!

Random Readers Book Club #2 – ROOM by Emma Donoghue

As promised, I am coming to you now with a book review on Emma Donoghue’s slightly chilling book “Room”.

This book met with mixed reviews at our club last night. Some found it a difficult read as it is written entirely from the POV of a young child – who turns 5 in the first few words of the story. Some whizzed through it because it was so simply written. All of us, though, were able to agree that it was a tough subject, and forced a lot of reflection on the current state of the world.

A brief synopsis, as always:

5 year old Jack lives with his mother in a tiny 11x12 foot box, known to Jack as Room. A popular slogan found for the book goes “Room is all there is”. Jack has never been outside of Room. He was born there, and grown up there, and as far as he knows, there is no other world beyond Room. His mother ensures he develops both physically and intellectually by dividing their days into specific time slots for numerous and varied activities. These activities range from ‘gym’ where they do physical activity to “repeat” where they watch T.V. and the mother mutes it every once and awhile for Jack to repeat everything he can remember, thus developing his vocabulary.

Half of the book is spent developing these two characters, and describing in great detail the painstaking effort Jack’s mother puts into his development. This is then constantly overshadowed by an eerie sense of foreboding when they do much more sinister activities such as “scream” where they stand as close to the skylight as possible (the only vessel for natural light) and yell and scream at the top of their lungs. Or the strangeness of the mother flicking the light on and off at night for varying intervals of time. And finally, the visits from “Old Nick” throughout which time Jack is always hidden in the wardrobe, safe from the old man’s eyes. All of this leaves readers with a sense of uneasiness that builds until the reasons behind Room and their complete captivity is revealed.

While I will not delve into the plotline too much so as not to reveal the story, I will say they do eventually get out of Room, and are then forced to re-enter society. This becomes a task so enormous to Jack that he is then prompted to say the heart-wrenching phrase “In Room I was safe, and it’s Outside that’s the scary”.

The book left us all a bit empty as it does demand readers sit within their own unease for a good 54% of the book, and then forces them to confront the state of the world, and what people can be capable of. All from the innocence of a young boy’s mind, making it all the more heartbreaking. It also opens the door to many philosophical questions about the nature of our lives, and how much of our physical environments are tangible, and how much of them are merely our perceptions?

While I enjoyed the metaphysical and psychological aspects of the book, I did find it to have moments when it was a little disjointed. It seemed strange to me that this mother would spend so much time and effort to teach her child and protect her child and yet, once they re-entered society, she seemed to do a 180 and was suddenly very impatient with him. She would demand so much of Jack, seemingly frustrated that he was so slow at adapting to this strange new world. There was also discussion last night about the way they were able to get out of Room and how the process seemed to be a little far fetched. Many a CSI moment to it, and was a little hard to believe.

All in all, it was a great read. I liked the POV for the reason that it did offer euphemisms for some acts I was happy to turn my proverbial blind eye. There were also some beautiful imagery and similes/metaphors interwoven, one of which I’ll share below:

“When I tell her what I’m thinking, and she tells me what she’s thinking our ideas jump into each others’ head like coloring blue crayon on top of yellow that makes green.”

Lovely.

I also enjoyed the psychological look at how Jack would adapt to being outside of Room and trying to take on his new environment. Interestingly, while there was appropriate attention paid to the obvious immaturities with regards to social responses, the book also focused on the less obvious things of his challenge. Such as the fact that Jack had severe spatial problems, and would constantly be bumping into things. Having lived for 5 years in the same 11x12 foot space, he was so familiar with that environment, he didn’t develop that part of the brain which recognized new physical objects and created the process of learning how to avoid them.

Another poignant image was when the news and media began calling Jack the “Bonsai Boy” as in, Stunted Growth. He was mature in his vocabulary, math, etc. healthy and seemingly perfectly preserved like the bonsai tree. Yet, he was also stunted in that he had not developed in so many other (social) ways.

Emma Donoghue does a wonderful job with this book, and I do give her credit, though I also found some aspects at times uncomfortable and hard to face. Having said that, I believe that this was the point of the book, as Emma did not mean to leave anyone with the warm and fuzzies after reading. Though it does end with the promise of a new life for our mother and son, it still forces us to recognize there are dark facets to society, and the effects are so far reaching, we cannot even fathom.

Thank you all for reading, and I hope you’ll come back in a month for our next book “Everyone is Beautiful” by Katherine Center. Kudos to Robyn for choosing, as the name suggests, what promises to be an uplifting great summer read.

Thanks again, and we’ll see you all soon!

20 Things I've Learned in the Last Year

I've been rolling these things around in my mind for awhile now and have finally decided to get them down on paper. Most of these things I had heard somewhere before throughout my 20 some years (;D) but didn't have an actual example that applied it to me specifically until recently. Some of these things were learned the hard way. But all of it was enlightening, and I hope you get something from them too ;D

1. People disappoint you. It’s a fact of life. And more often than not, it is purely unintentional.

2. Everyone is different. In the absolute most fundamental way. Everyone has different perceptions on everything because they have all grown up in a different environment, with different influences, and forming brain connections at different times etc etc etc.

3. Further to number 2 – Perception = Biased Perspective. This is often the basis for most arguments, disagreements and fights.

4. Further to number 3 – the belief that, in an argument someone is right and someone is wrong is not only narrow-minded but also, (and ironically) false. Most of the time, all parties are right because of the fact in number 2. People come at all things from their own heads. Metaphysically, since their upbringing, environment, beliefs, and experiences have drawn them to the conclusion they have, how can anyone say they are wrong?

5. Most things happen for a reason. And please keep in mind I’m only coming at this from MY OWN fairly sheltered experience. I am not commenting on rape victims, families of murdered members etc etc. Just from my own life, and the lives of people around me. And I did say MOST things happen for a reason. Not all.

6. Further to number 5 – there is a way to see the good in almost everything. There is a logical, theoretical, and mathematical way to apply the concepts of ‘The Secret’ to life. I have a vague understanding of this, but not quite concrete enough to write a dissertation ;)

7.  People change. But the paradigm here is that this statement includes you too. So the change may be small in the others, but when you change at the same time, the combined effect seems much larger.

8. The concept of Opportunity Cost is much more prevalent in most peoples’ decision making than they realize.

9. Crying is allowed. But there is a limit to how much other people tolerate. And that limit depends on many factors.

10. I have a theory on why there is so much divorce – up until the time we marry, we as a society are presented with everything in our lives in the construct of a specific timeline. School is only so many months of the year. Then, that particular SCHOOL is only so many years before you move to another. Even once graduated, the average person nowadays works at a job for 3-4 years. And then, standing up at the altar, we are asked to commit to something FOREVER, a concept we have NEVER had to consider before… Is it any wonder marriages fall apart in the first couple of years???

11. The statement “People come into your life for a reason, a season, or forever” is truer than most people realize, and causes a lot of pain when your idea of where a person should fit isn’t actually true. It is a sign of great maturity when you are able to see that your perception was off, and accept the real slot that person fits into.

12. Everyone has their shit/Everyone has their story. And there’s a time and place to delve into that. But again, balance. There needs to be a limit. And everyone should take turns both telling their story and listening to others’ stories.

13. There are people in the world who, to the rest of us, appear perfect, and blessed. The ones for whom everything goes smoothly. And for some of them, the ax never does fall. And I believe those people are here to be shoulders for those of us who do have more trials. They are our supporters, and we are better equipped to handle trials because of these people and their help.

14. It isn’t fair to compare trials. Because the most pressing pain for any given person is the worst pain they’ve ever experienced. So, regardless of the trial causing the pain, their pain is just as real as any others’.

15. We are social creatures. As much as I believe there is a way to achieve happiness purely within oneself, we still all need to feel important to others as well.

16. The world IS amazing. And there’s a lot to be said for seeing it, experiencing it, and appreciating it.

17. Most of the time, conflicts can be solved quickly because people are often only looking for the following: a) To be heard b) An apology (ie: validation).

18. Things will go wrong. It’s not about avoiding problems. It’s about how you deal with them.

19. Allow yourself victory. Sorry to say, but for the most part no one else is going to continuously build you up, and pat you on the back. So do yourself a favor, and do it FOR yourself.

20. There are so many things in the world that can stress us out. Really analyze the things that do, and decide if they are worth it. Because if they aren’t, there are many more things that are out there merely to be experienced, and marveled at. A much more worthy past time don’t you think?

Random Reader's Book Club #1: Handle with Care by Jodi Picoult

As promised, I will be commenting on the various books I'll be reading within my bookclub, The Random Readers. Our first selection was "Handle with Care" by Jodi Picoult.

If you don't know her, Jodi Picoult was the author of "My Sisters' Keeper" a highly well known novel that has now been fashioned into a movie. Handle with Care is basically just another version.

For those who do know her, Jodi Picoult delivered, in this novel, her traditional formula:

Moral Dilemna + Court Case + Bang over the head symbolism and parallel characters + Twist at the end = Handle with Care

An enjoyable read, if you go in with this expectation. Which I did. Having read both My Sister's Keeper, and Vanishing Acts, I was well aware of Picoult's style, and was not the least bit surprised by her latest work of fiction.

A brief synopsis:

A blended family of four (two adults, two kids) are dealing with one of the child's (Willow - as in bends but doesn't break) debilitating disease: Osteogenesis Imperfecta. As the name suggests, this disease has to do with mal-formed bones which are said to be 'brittle' and break at the drop of a hat. Willow breaks bones when she sneezes. And she will always be small as her bones will never grow to their full extent.

The major plot around this is that the Mother (Charlotte) is offerred the chance to testify in a lawsuit that could award her a large sum of money to cover Willow's needs both at present, in the future, and even beyond Charlotte's earthly existance as her care giver. However, the lawsuit is one of "Wrongful Birth" which suggests that had Charlotte known early enough about the disease from her accused gynecologist, she would have terminated the pregnancy. In other words, she has to swear she would've had Willow's birth prevented knowing full well Willow is old enough to understand, and knowing how the world will react (including her husband Sean, and her other daughter Amelia). Oh, and by the way, her gynocologist whom she is suing also happens to be her best friend, Piper. Yeah.

Of course, there's also Charlotte's lawyer, who, as with the lawyer in My Sister's Keeper, also has a side story pertaining to the dilemna. Finally, just for extra measure, Picoult makes Charlotte an ex-pastry chef, a career which continually demands the 'careful handling' of ingredients etc. To punctuate, Picoult ads a recipe for a different pastry every couple of chapters.

I did enjoy the novel, as it was easy to get through, and delivered exactly what Picoult always promises. As with any hit-over-the-head symbolism, I found myself rolling my eyes a lot. Mostly at the end, when the twist I had figured out a couple chapters prior turned out as expected. If you are fan of Jodi Picoult, bottom line: This novel will not disappoint. Jodi writes as though she is expecting to be read for a bookclub. So we did our part, and proceeded accordingly.

At the book club we discussed briefly the elements of the book that merit conversation. The moral dilemna of course as the main topic. Should someone be allowed to sue for "Wrongful Birth" if the baby is born less than perfect? How far away is this then from genetically engineered babies?

Personally, I think the lawsuit was justified. Yes, it was hard on the Mother, and the rest of the family. But when it comes down to it, Mama bear will always sacrifice for the good of her child. Even if it means hurting her a little bit in the present to reap greater rewards in the future.

There is one very powerful scene at the climax of the book where Charlotte is on trial, and is asked point-blank if she would've had Willow's existence terminated given the choice. Charlotte's response is absolutely perfect, and as a logicaly and metaphysicaly minded person, I ate it up. Essentially, Charlotte responded by saying that the question wasn't really applicable, nor justified because she now knows Willow inside and out, and loves her deeply, and wouldn't trade her for the world. It is impossible to answer a question about making a decision in the past now that she is in the future, and has the knowledge on the issue which she lacked at that time. The lawsuit was about the fact that she wasn't offerred the choice, not about which choice she would've made. Well done Jodi. Lovely use of the metaphysical and abstract!

I will not spoil the ending, and will not go into further detail to allow for your own reading pleasure, and opinion formation.

I'm pleased to announce it was my choice for the next book within the bookclub, and I have assigned Emma Donoghue's "Room". Stay tuned for its review next month ;D

Playing in the Mud

Recently, I have been thinking a lot about this phenomenon that I have dubbed "Playing in the Mud". We all do it. It's human nature. It's the process of wallowing. Focussing on the negatives. Allowing the negatives to define us. Playing in the mud.

I've come to many conclusions about this phenomenon. One of the biggest one is that, as mentioned above, it's unavoidable. While all self help books tell us not to, and offer us tools as to how to avoid doing it, I believe it could be counter-productive and more detrimental to try and avoid it than not. Like everything, there needs to be balance. Denying anything, even a negative emotion, I believe, can do more damage than acknowledging it.

Yet, as mentioned above, there needs to be balance. Everything in moderation. Things go wrong in your life, whether you are late to work 'cause you missed your alarm or you are dealing with emotional scars from the past. But denying how they make you feel could compound the problem. Rather, allow the emotions to be. Allow the pain to come through. I know, this sounds bizarre. But I really believe that there needs to be that point of "grieving" through the pain.

But then move on. Otherwise, you are Playing in the Mud. I'm not saying that you never think about it. I'm not saying you buy out Chapters' self help section, and refuse to ever open that part of your life again. What I mean is allow yourself pain, but give yourself a timeline. Know that it hurts, but know that it will not always be like this. Do whatever you need to in that space to deal with the pain. Eat the ice cream. Take a bath and cry. Scream into your pillow. Talk about it with anyone who'll listen. And then, at the end of the timeline, start a plan of attack. Decide what needs to be done to help the situation, and begin again.

I've recently spent time with a few loved ones who have dealt with 'obstacles' shall we say. Set backs. And I found I had to both times point out this concept of 'playing in the mud'. Yes, this one thing happened. Yes, it is unfair, bad timing, shitty, and painful. I don't disagree with that. And I didn't. For three days. And then a week. After about 10 days, I started to think, okay wait a minute. It's time to move out of this.

Again, I don't want to sound unrealistic. We all know it's not that black and white. You don't wake up one day, decide on a plan of action, and the problem starts to get better immediately. But I'm not saying that. I'm saying, just don't focus on the negative aspect after your deadline. I'm not commanding you to "be better". Just to "Think better". And again, this isn't a quick fix. Because you are going to feel shitty most of the day. But allow yourself the time to shelve it for awhile.

I once spoke with a friend about meditation. I referred to the scene in "Eat, Pray, Love" where Julia Robert's character tries to meditate. And fails miserably. She can't focus after about 1.3 minutes. And what this friend told me was that the way people often approach meditation is unrealistic. They go into it deciding they will meditate for 10-15 minutes. According to my friend, the first time one meditates, 3 minutes is considered a victory. And she told me that no matter how hard I tried, my mind would wander. Her exact words, I believe, were "just accept that". Then, she said, bring your attention back to the area under your eyes. Just feel what they feel like from the inside.

My point with this anecdote is simply this: As with mind wandering during meditation, so is the unavoidable obsession with the negative aspects of an upsetting event. It's going to happen. Accept it. Then, return your thoughts to the area under your eyes. Or, in other words, return your thoughts to something tangible, something realistic, and something true. A plan of attack. Perspective. Glimmers of hope. Moments of quietude and peace. And, above all, make this goal tangible. No, there's a good chance if you decide you aren't going to talk or think negatively for a full day, it won't work. You can't meditate your first time for longer than 3 minutes, for goodness sake. So say, for 15 minutes, I'm going to think of a way to either deal with this event, or gain perspective on the larger picture etc. Like meditation, as you continue practicing, it will get easier to go for longer.

And then one day, you will find that you've stepped out of a mud puddle. And you are cleaner for it.

A Little Girl

Yesterday, I was meeting with a friend of mine in the mall. We were having a regular conversation when a young girl, probably about 7 or 8, ran into the middle of the food court, and let out a piercing scream. At first, we just ignored her, figuring a temper tantrum. But then I took a closer look. And recognized the sheer panic in her saucer-sized eyes. She was lost. And VERY frightened.

Before I could react, another lady, obviously a mother, but not hers (she was of different ethnic background to the little girl) came up to her and immediately began to ask the girl what her mom looked like. Where she saw her last, etc etc. The girl was too far into a panic that she couldn’t answer. So the woman said “I’m going to pick you up so you can look and see if you see her”. I was amazed that the girl let her, though she seemed to be oblivious of the woman, and just frantically looking around.

By this time, everyone in the food court was focused on this activity. Most of us were also looking in every direction, trying to locate what was probably an equally frantic woman running across the mall to collect her child. The agitation grew as the moments flew by and this didn’t happen.

Finally, the woman began to walk towards a worker – a cleaning lady emptying the garbage. After a few moments, a security guard appeared, and the three of them hurried away together.

After a few startled moments, the food court returned to its familiar buzz, and the incident was forgotten. But every once and awhile, the little girl crosses my mind. What was the story there? How had she gotten so misplaced at the mall? Did she find mom? And how long was it until they were reunited?

I recall the look of complete panic and fear in the little girl’s eyes. We’ve all been there haven’t we? Some of us have been in both positions – played the part of the little girl, and of the stricken mother.

There are times that I forget how safe we are in Canada. Because that scene at the mall would be so different in some of the war torn countries. While the general feeling at the mall was sympathy for the little girl, there was little panic among the onlookers. We felt her fear, but we also knew better – mom’s around. And she isn’t going anywhere till she gets her little one back. But in war torn countries, that wouldn’t be as certain. And the little girl may not have been the only child screaming and missing a parent. And the onlookers would be dealing with their own terror at the same time.

While I don’t know the ending to the scene yesterday, I can pretty much guess. A reunion, some stern words, a few tears, and then hugs and affection. But in so many areas in the world, those endings are few and far between.

And that little girl doesn’t know how lucky she really is…

Apologies..... and Elevators

Well, I was afraid this was going to happen. This was one of the reasons I avoided creating a blog. Because I knew I would start to lose interest in keeping it updated. That unless I made profound discoveries that I could put into great diction, and proper grammar and spelling, it wasn’t worth posting. Therefore there would be long stretches where there would be no posts… And it has come to this.

I am sorry for that, I really am. Part of it is that I do not feel like getting on the computer on weekends, or evenings after spending most of my days at work in front of one. But mostly, it is due to what I said above - lack of anything real to say.

I make minor observations daily which I think “this would be good on the blog”. But I just don’t ever get around to writing it down.

One example of this, was a couple of weeks ago, when an acquaintance of mine was in the hospital, and I was riding elevators on a daily basis. Aren’t elevators just the most intricate social experiment, I thought. Think about it. Have you ever watched people in an elevator? They are such a strain for most people. It creates an instant social cohesion. Everyone is forced to be closer than proper social convention dictates, and because it’s such a brief encounter, it almost offers the opportunity for the most intense connection. Say, in a hospital for instance. You know the other people are visiting someone. Often someone very close to them, much like yourself. And you can form a bond over that so quickly.

Then there are less straight forward social connections. If you get in an elevator with someone, and they make a comment about your purse, or the weather, etc, are you required/expected to bid them adieu when you reach your floor? Or if they reach theirs, do you have a right to be slightly put out if they don’t say anything upon exiting? And what is the appropriate exiting words? “Have a good life” seems rather presumptious, and awfully flippant. But really, it’s one of the nicest things to say… and kind of appropriate in a way.

And there are the different types of elevators. There are elevators which have the buttons for the floors on both sides instead of one. These are easier on many because they don’t have to reach as far, or ask others to punch the buttons for them. There are elevators that are glass therefore affording a more open feeling, rather than the more traditional, and older boxed in versions. Nightmares for claustophobics. What about the elevators with doors on either side? For people with directional problems, those cause a sort of twilight zone pendulum shift for them. Yes, I thought, there’s a lot to be said about elevators.

But would anyone listen? Would anyone care? Or would you all read this and say… okaaaayyy, she started off great with reviews on books and movies, but then started talking about elevators?

Well, have no fear. I have joined a book club. Yes, a real live book club with real bona-fide paperbacks (though, I admit, I’m using the Kobo e-reader). But still. And yes, we are having in depth discussions over real ‘thinker’ books. Which I am hoping to be able to comment here on my blog.

So, I’ll leave you with two promises:

1 – I will endeavour to be MUCH more consistent with postings and

2 – No more blogs about elevators :D

"The Prestige" – Modern Day Shakespeare?

Right, so perhaps I am on a Christopher Nolan kick here. I think I have found my new favourite director/writer.

I watched this again on the weekend as well, and realized almost instantly, that I would also like to comment on it. What a moral mind bend this one is. I feel it should’ve gotten SO much more attention, but was buried because it came out at the same time as The Illusionist with Edward Norton. Just to clarify, The Prestige has a much more well-known cast comprised of Hugh Jackman, Christian Bale, Scarlett Johanson, Rachel McAdams, Michael Caine, and yes, even David Bowie. REALLY great movie. If you haven’t seen it – I would recommend it.

One thing though – it’s VERY dark. The movie itself visually is quite dark, but the moods, motifs, morals, messages… very dark. But again, a movie I would call a thinker. Yes, it has the trademark Nolan twist at the end… but for goodness sake, it’s a movie about Magicians!!! You can’t very well expect a straight forward ending right?

The movie makes you think, though, about what people are willing to sacrifice. And how easy it is as an audience to be fooled.  Not just in the case of a magic trick. But also, when it comes to us as the audience watching the movie, with regards to which character we are supposed to empathize with. The first time I watched this movie, I felt bad for Hugh Jackman’s character. He was the one who lost his wife in the first place. And he was the one who fought so hard to beat the other man at his own game. Be the better magician. And he loses his life in the process. Poor him. And yet, Christian Bale’s character also loses his wife. And in his case, his wife chose to die – chose to leave him whereas for Hugh, his wife died through accidental causes. So perhaps, in the end, it is Christian’s character who deserves our sympathy. Besides, Hugh’s character almost bring on his own demise when you think about it – he was so obsessed with revenge. So consumed with making Christian pay for the death of his wife that he couldn’t see beyond that. Couldn’t even open himself to being happy with Scarlett Johanson. And yet. Christian was even more obsessed. To the point that he was willing to live only half of his actual life. Looking at it that way, they are both equally damnable. And equally wretched.

These two men remind me of Shakespeare’s tragic heros. They are good men, but with one large flaw that gets exploited. And what, most often than not, is this mortal flaw? Why, ego of course. The desire to be the best of the best. That, and revenge. The desire to destroy all those who have trifled you in the past. Those two almost always show up in Shakespeare’s plays as the ultimate element causing the hero’s demise. No different in Nolan’s movie.

I really did enjoy this movie – the twists, the turns, and the fact that, the second time around, you again get more from it.

Whereas with Inception, you are merely gleaning information to fill in gaps on the second time around, with The Prestige, knowing the twist at the end, you catch more phrases, and the scenes play out differently once you have that information on the second viewing.

One of my favorite things, besides writing about these movies, is watching them with people that haven’t seen them before. If you have not had the pleasure, let me know! I’d be happy to watch it with you. But even happier to discuss it with you afterwards. 

Thanks for reading!!!

Inception = The Matrix Cubed

I watched Christopher Nolan’s masterpiece again on the weekend as I had had every intention of commenting on this movie on my blog, and wanted more inspiration. Yes, I said masterpiece. No, you don’t have to agree with me. I respect that everyone is different. I just ask you respect my right to love the movie ;D

This coming from the girl who had a, some would say, unhealthy obsession with The Matrix trilogy.

I believe the title of this blog post represents it the best. I honestly believe the best way to put it is that Inception is The Matrix cubed. In other words, it’s the same premise of the movie, but taken to the third power. Three levels further in/down. I loved it.

I found myself wanting to take notes. Seriously. As though I would be writing a paper on it. This is one of those movies I want to dissect at school. Yes, I am that geek. I only wish it had come out early enough for Dad to see. He would’ve loved it too. :D

I won’t go into detail about the plots etc. I’m happy to answer questions people have if they come up. I’d like to think after watching it 4 times that I’m pretty well versed on the ins and outs of the plot. It’s more about the theme that I’m interested in discussing. The concept that you can go deep into someone else’s mind. The fact that if you aren’t stable, that can show up by materializing into a locomotive crashing through the middle of an intersection. Cobb was so wrecked by guilt, he would sabotage himself over and over again. Yet, I don’t believe he was as responsible as he claimed to be. Yes he planted that idea in his late wife’s mind. But he was sort of forced to do something right? And he didn’t know what the result would be. He didn’t do it on purpose. It was no more his fault than getting into a car with his wife that then crashes and he survives.

But I think, really, the biggest question people have is about the ending. (Isn’t it always?). The top continues to spin, and the screen goes black before we know if it falls or not. It wobbles, so there is doubt. But we as the audience don’t know for sure whether Cobb has actually returned to reality, or if he is still dreaming.

What I took from that scene wasn’t whether the top fell or not. The point of that scene is that it doesn’t matter. There is that one scene near the beginning where Cobb is alone in his hotel, he spins the top and while watching, arms his gun, and brings it to his head. When the top falls, he breaths in relief and drops the gun. He is obsessed throughout the film as to what is reality and what isn’t. Whether he is sharing a dream or not. The point at the end is that he no longer cares either way. He has, by then, made peace with Mol, and is back to his children which is what really matters to him, and all that he ever wanted anyways. Is he still dreaming? Who cares?

I found this interesting. I remember thinking in The Matrix that wouldn’t it just be easier to not know? I mean, why fight these machines, and live in that dirty, scorched-sky existence when we could all just be as we are? The character Cypher follows this through, and actually devises a way to get back into the Matrix. Of course, he’s considered the bad guy. But really, why is that so wrong?

I know, I know, I’m really shaming myself now. Basically opening up to all of you and saying I’d rather have rosy coloured glasses than know the truth and be free. Maybe that makes me lazy. Let others fight the robots. I’m gonna go have an ice cream.

But I don’t think so. I think this could even be linked back to “Life of Pi”. What makes the better story? Cobb has faith there that he is with his children, and that he is where he is supposed to be. And why question that? And again, it’s not about believing in things that we know don’t exist just because it’s easier. It’s believing in them because we cannot disprove them. Cobb wanted to get back to his children. And he does. End of story.

Virtual Book Club Post #1 - "Life of Pi"

Here is the posting I had initially decided to use as my second entry:

To kick things off, I have three posts in mind: One regarding the movie Inception, one a copy and paste version of the PRK surgery experience from my Facebook note, and one on the book “Life of Pi”. I received Inception in December for Christmas, had the PRK surgery January 18^th  2011, and ‘read’ Life of Pi while recovering from said surgery. However, as I am most passionately engrossed with Life of Pi right now, I will begin with it.

As mentioned above, I experienced Life of Pi while recovering from my laser eye surgery earlier this year. I say experienced, because, though it is a book, I was unable to read it due to very reason I needed to. So, I bought the audiobook, and listened to it as often as I could. I have bittersweet memories of the book – it was a fascinating story, but there were parts of it that I listened through a sort of delirium from the pain from the surgery, and a drug induced fog.

As with most pieces of art, at least for me, Life of Pi left me thinking, and thinking and thinking some more. I craved the chance to discuss it with others, find out what they thought of it, what their interpretation of it was, and debate the many themes and motifs in the book. Of course, this sort of thing is well suited to a book club. However, there are quite a few problems with book clubs. The largest being the fact that it requires a major time commitment by all involved. Which just isn’t realistic. And so, the idea of this blog began to form in my mind. I could have a sort of bookclub myself – just have it online! I will post my own thoughts from the book, and perhaps be lucky enough to have others read both the comments and the book itself, and maybe even offer thoughts of their own! Additionally, as I often find trips to the library, bookstore, or even my virtual bookstore through my KoBo overwhelming, perhaps I will receive suggestions for other books to read and/or comment on!

With this came the onslaught of other things I could post on – movies, plays, other books, newsworthy stories… the list goes on… Obviously, I am not the only one who has thought about this, thus the existence of blogs in general, but was sure excited to come across it!

Anyhow, onwards. I wanted to address Life of Pi. If you have NOT read it, I would really strongly recommend not reading to the end of this post. I will be commenting on the book as though you have, and may both spoil the book, and confuse things, so it would probably be best for you to read it first.

After I ‘read’ the book, I went online and did some research on the internet to find out what others thought. I was thrilled to find essay after essay, forum after forum, blog post after blog post just riddled with comments. Brilliant!!! I wanted to post on every single one of them! Call everyone and discuss the book at length! 

What did YOU think?

Of course, one of the major issues that came up over and over (at least for me because I did narrow the search to the subject of the ending) was which story is the true one? Pi tells his Japanese interviewers two stories about his time on the Pacific. One is the story we readers spend 100+ pages living with him through every moment. The second only takes (I am told) approximately 7 pages, and a few minutes to tell. In the end, one is fantasmical, with animals, carnivorous islands, and another blind survivor on the Pacific Ocean. The other is brutal, gruesome, and involves only people – 4 survivors of the shipwreck which all die off save for Pi himself. The interviewers are only actually interested in how/why the boat sank, so it doesn’t make much difference to them what happened to Pi. When Pi realizes this, he asks the all important question at the climax of the book, defining the ultimate theme of the story: “If it makes no difference which story is true, then tell me, which one did you prefer?”

Throughout the blogs, forums, and essays, everyone was willing to agree that the point of the book was really to present the idea of faith – that a story with faith is better than one without. I read so many comments, but it was only when I hit the forum on Amazon.com that I became feverish with the idea of actually participating. This is the comment I wanted to post:

There are few things I would like to add to this forum.

First, thank you all for your comments. I love that not only was the book thought provoking, but there are others out there who wish to discuss these thoughts and provide different points of view thus enabling more depth to the story.

I would then  like to say that, being a very logical, and reason-loving person, I deduced that the second (more gruesome) story is the one that actually happened merely due to the following facts:

- the second story happened in a total time span of approximately 2 weeks to maybe a month. Which left Pi 6 months to come up with the second story and create the parallels to all the animals.

- the second story is told to the interviewers mere minutes after the first, which does not allow Pi to come up with such intricate animal parallels that quickly.

- and finally, why would Pi, given the chance to make up a story that is more plausible than the one with the animals, make it THAT gruesome? Would a 16 year old who just endured that journey with the tiger for 221 days really turn around afterwards and talk about the beheading of his own mother? Why???

For those reasons, I fully understand that the second story is the “true” fictional story. Haha! However, I am not without faith, and I understand the weight behind Pi's question "which is the better story?"

Finally, I would also like to comment on Doug's post where he was concerned that the message was a negative one. I think it was less about believing things we know cannot be true, and more having faith in things we haven't and can't DISprove because it makes the better story. Wouldn't it be nicer to live life with the faith there is something more, than to live in the stark existence of only what you see, hear, smell and feel?... After all, wasn't that the point of the Meerkats??? While I explained the plausibility of the second story, there was the banter where Pi insisted that there were meerkat bones on the boat which adds credence to the FIRST story... Again, I come back to the fact that there were 6 months NOT accounted for in his second story which could allow time for Pi to find meerkats somewhere... possibly even on a carnivorous island :D

I know I am contradicting myself, but I truly believe that is the point. We want to believe the first story. I truly did all the way through. I believed the french cast away. I believed the island. I believed it all even after he had told the second story. I had fully expected the second story to have parallels and was therefore still willing to believe the first story. But when the parallels were so detailed, and the story so gruesome, I fell back to my logic and figured it out. But the meerkats bugged me. And I love that they do. That little bit of faith is all that is needed.

Again, I really appreciate all of these posts, and only wish to discuss it more with people who care enough to discuss it ;D Thanks everyone!!!

Apparently, you have to have bought something on Amazon.com to post on their forum. Go figure. Anyhow, it has worked out because now, I can post for you!!!

I would truly love to hear any thoughts from people who have read Life of Pi, and would welcome other recommendations for other books that offer as much, if not more, thought provocation. Thanks for reading!!!

A Commemoration on this very Special Day.

I had other ideas for my second posting, but due to the date, I will push it back. Because today is special. Today is to commemorate my father, Douglas Robert Charman – and his passing 5 years ago.

During the time that he was sick, I kept my phone near me all the time. I left it on in class (on vibrate) and would leave class to check any voicemails I had. Dreading the ringing of the phone. Dreading the messages I might get. On the morning of Friday, February 10^th, 2006, I received THE message. My father had passed away at around 3 in the morning. No rush to get to the hospice – but the rest of the family would be there when I arrived. I took a shower, and cried out loud, letting the water fall over me and take the tears with it.  

Once at the hospice, I was greeted by my grandfather, who directed me to the family lounge. Both my grandparents told me I was more than welcome to go in and sit with him. The hospice staff had left him in the room for us to pay respects. I could tell, even though she encouraged it, my grandmother didn’t want me to go in. She said he was no longer warm – that he was truly gone, and that it was simply an empty shell. I agreed. I preferred to remember him as he had been the last time I saw him.

Our pastor arrived shortly thereafter. He encouraged us to hold the funeral as soon as possible. Both Bonnie and I were adamant that it would be 8 days later – the following Saturday. He discouraged this, but we held our ground. She wanted it to be perfect. I wanted to prepare a speech. And partly, as I admitted later, I was afraid as soon as the funeral was over, people would forget. So I figured the longer we could delay that, the better.

I did speak at the funeral. I remember getting through it fairly well, as long as I didn’t look at my family. Two of my very dear friends attended. They had told me to look for them – that I could use them as my rocks while speaking. I wasn’t able to find them while at the podium. Just as well – they told me afterwards they bawled their eyes out as soon as the family started coming in.

While most of this posting is sad, I now think of this day as a day to celebrate. Whatever ones religious beliefs, today can always in someway be considered a rebirth. A time to be thankful for the years I did have with my father, what he taught me both in life and in death. The closeness I now share with my grandparents. The deep gratitude for the existence of my brother – him being the only other that lost a father when Doug Charman passed away.

When it comes to Dad, I always feel like I can never say enough. I want to fill these pages with stories and commemorations. I want to copy and paste my speech from the funeral. I want to copy and paste the lovely email I received from one of Dad’s high school friends this morning (showing that even now, 5 years AFTER the funeral, people still remember). But I know that his essence, his memory, cannot be captured in words.  All I can really say is that his memory is alive in me, in my brother Adam, in my stepmother Bonnie, in my mother Deborah, in my grandparents Helen and Robert Charman, in my aunt and uncle Lori and Glenn Charman, my cousins, Jesse and Cody Briggs, and Carly and Troy Charman and all those spouses, extended family, friends, colleagues and everyone we touch as a result of us having our beings shaped by the man my father was.

Thank you all for your love and thoughts on this very special day!

Hello, and Welcome!!

I am very excited to be starting this blog. The idea has been churning in my mind for a little while now – ever since a good friend of mine started one that I’ve been trying to follow diligently. I struggled with the theme of my blog. I’ve seen people who use the blog to review plays and shows within the city. I’ve seen others keep it kind of like a diary. I considered basing the blog around my housesitting experiences.  But I think I would find that too limiting. I have every intention of having various posts regarding housesitting experiences, but the blog itself won’t be solely surrounding them.

I think the main goal of this blog is to indulge a little bit in my passionate side. As the title of it suggests, my logic side has taken over since, well, I would say 2^nd year in college when I switched my degree from an Arts major to an International Business major. The passing of my father sealed the deal, and most of my passionate, and creative side went with him. I have spent many a time musing why this would be, and even mourned it awhile. But I have since made peace with it, and am now taking steps to slowly bring back that passion, creativity, and love of the arts.

My entrepreneurial side fought me a little when I decided to create this blog. That mind wanted me to use my gifts of analysis, and deeper thought to make money. Write a book. Become a counselor. My passionate side, though quietly, said instead to enjoy it, revel in it, and share it. And so, I bring you my blog – Logically Educated; Passionately Inclined.